Cub Scouts

Well, my lil' buddy-boy is going to be a Wolf Cub this year. We're going to go over to a nearby town where they have an extremely active Scout Den. We could've had a den closer to home, but there wasn't anyone to be a "den mother." I'm all for him being a Scout, but I'm not a good candidate for leader! Anyway, the other group, which is about 25 miles away, seems to be a cheerful, energetic, active bunch.

Now we get to go to Sherman to the Scout store to buy his uniform. He's going to be so handsome in his lil' blue and yellow outfit.

Pathetic

As I'm sitting here watching Greta Van Susteren on FOXnews, I'm just disgusted with the Warren Jeffs case already. The actual warrant for the guy's arrest is for rape, and as they read the court documents, I can already tell that this case is as thin as Pluto's atmosphere. Sheesh.

From the Arizona Republic: Prosecuting a Prophet

He was riding in a brand-new red Cadillac Escalade just outside of Las Vegas with a brother, one of his wives and $54,000 in cash.

Now he's in jail.

Now the word "captured" runs under the pictures of polygamous cult leader Warren Jeffs on the FBI's Ten Most Wanted fugitive list.

Now the hard part begins.

It isn't going to be easy to prosecute a man seen as a holy prophet by as many as 10,000 people. This man is so revered that former followers say parents give him their daughters for child brides and shun their sons at his decree.

Jeffs' followers stuck by him when he was a fugitive. They kept money flowing to fuel his Cadillac lifestyle.

Members of his polygamous Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints aren't going to line up to testify when he becomes a defendant.

That's why it took courage to pursue Jeffs.

Arizona Attorney General Terry Goddard, Utah Attorney General Mark Shurtleff and Mohave County Attorney Matt Smith deserve credit for doing what decades of their predecessors did not do. They went after the alleged sex offenders in Colorado City, Ariz., and Hildale, Utah.

But as the Mohave County experience shows, it can be a thankless job to try and enforce the law.

In one of eight cases pursued by Smith, Kelly Fischer was convicted on July 7 of two felony sex crimes in connection with his polygamous "marriage" to his stepdaughter when she was 16.

Here's why going after cases takes courage: The child bride not only did not testify at the trial, she wrote a letter to the judge urging leniency toward the man she calls her husband - the man her mother also calls husband.

Prosecutor Smith used the birth certificate of the child bride's first child as evidence against Fischer, and won his case. The judge sentenced Fischer to 45 days in jail.

Forty-five days.

Consider another young bride in one of the other cases being prosecuted by Smith. Last summer she testified before a grand jury about how she became the second wife of Randolph Barlow when she was 16 - on orders from Jeffs. She said the consummation of that "marriage" was not consensual.

Yet she balked at cooperating with prosecutors at trial. She won't testify.

Finding someone willing to testify against Jeffs will prove even tougher.

Prosecutors could get burned. That's what happened in 1953, when an attempt to stop the polygamous cult became a public relations nightmare. That's why nothing stopped the cult from swelling and thriving along Arizona's northern border.

That's why the public needs to see the capture of Warren Jeffs for what it is. It is a victory over a cult of secrecy in which evil has reportedly grown stronger than the love of parents for their children.

The capture of Jeffs is not, unfortunately, a deathblow to that cult. It will take continued tenacity, such as that shown by Gary Engels, the investigator for the Mohave County Attorney's Office who collected evidence against the cult bullies.

It was routine when a Nevada Highway Patrol officer pulled over a red Caddie on Monday. It was serendipity when that officer recognized Jeffs. It will take a lot more to effectively prosecute this prophet.

One of the most important elements in that effort will be strong, vocal public support for the people who took on a tough job just because it was the right thing to do.

Lockheed-Martin... TO THE MOON!!!

Lockheed Martin wins NASA moon contract

In picking Lockheed Martin for Orion, described by NASA's chief as "Apollo on steroids," NASA bypassed Apollo throwbacks Northrop Grumman of Los Angeles and its chief subcontractor Boeing of Chicago. Northrop Grumman predecessor built the Apollo lunar lander. Companies bought by Boeing built the Apollo, Gemini, and Mercury capsules, Skylab and the space shuttle.

"NASA decided to do something different and go with a company that has not been in manned space before, sort of spreading the wealth and making sure they've got two contractors that know the manned space business," said aerospace industry analyst Paul Nisbet, president of JSA Research.

My sister and brother-in-law work for Lockheed-Martin, so I'm a fan.

Today's English lesson

Instead of some nitpicky error, today I'll point out a non-error instead -- one that your own English teacher may have insisted you correct, but which isn't really wrong.

From Dr. Paul Brians at Common Errors in English:

Dinner is done; people are finished.

I pronounce this an antiquated distinction rarely observed in modern speech. Nobody really supposes the speaker is saying he or she has been roasted to a turn. In older usage people said, "I have done" to indicate they had completed an action. "I am done" is not really so very different.

Today's fortune cookie

Subsiste Sermonem Statim.

The Painter of Light is in a leetle trouble...

I've never been a fan of Thomas Kinkade's work... lovely, perhaps, but overly saccharine and cheesy, definitely... but now he's actually in a little hot water with the feds.

Please don't take me for having sour grapes against a fellow artist. I'm all for artists succeeding financially with their craft... but bad-faith business practices (if that's what he's guilty of) are not what I would expect from a professed Christian artist.

You wouldn't have found any Kinkade prints in my house even before I read this. Not my cup o'tea, really. This one appeals to me a little more...



...but I know everyone's taste is different. Kinkade's work wouldn't be netting him that much dough if it weren't appealing on a gargantuan scale.

And I hope he isn't an unscrupulous businessman. That would be a big disappointment, and another public black eye for Christians in general. Nevermind that I can't remember the last time a group of crazed Christians flew planes into skyscrapers or beheaded hostages. But that's a topic for another post, another day.

The guitar wizard guy

Remember that post awhile back where I had the video of that guy playing a guitar version of Pachelbel's Canon? Well, they've finally tracked down just who that guy really is.



Meet Jeong-Hyun Lim, a 23-year-old Korean who taught himself guitar over the course of the last six years. Now living in Seoul, he listens avidly to Bach and Vivaldi, and in 2000 he took a month of guitar lessons. He plays an ESP, an Alfee Custom SEC-28OTC with gold-colored detailing.

Jeong-Hyun, you RAWK!!

Another funny t-shirt design

Mecca weather forecast -- t-shirt

Today's English lesson

From Common Errors in English:

Chuckles & Chunks

In casual conversation, you may get by with saying "Chuck [throw] me that monkey wrench, will you?"

But you will mark yourself as illiterate beyond mere casualness by saying instead "Chunk me that wrench."

This is a fairly common substitution in some dialects of American English.

Today's fortune cookie

T-shirt fun from IMAO and America's Funnyman, FrankJ

Cool T-shirt from IMAO

May he rot in perpetuity

!! CAPTURED !!

Beeb and Mrs. Beeb can dance!!

Who knew? My uncle Beeb and his wife actually DANCED at their daughter's wedding last weekend! They surprised my cousins and the rest of the family by revealing that they'd spent the last eight weeks taking line-dancing lessons so that they could dance at the wedding. They danced to The Electric Slide (no kidding!) and the Boot Scootin' Boogie. I made sure to snap a couple of pix, just to preserve the evidence.

And no, Beeb isn't his actual name. It's what I called him when I was very small, before I knew how to say his name. And to protect the guilty, I'll just continue to call him Beeb when I refer to him. He and his wife are very cool people, by the way. I'm glad I live closer to them.

Lighting a water heater

It ain't easy. In fact, it's durn near impossible.

This morning, my shower was cool. Not cool as in "stylin'", cool as in Low Temperature.

I took lots of cool showers in Haiti, where there wasn't a water-heater to be had, so I just made the mental transition necessary to endure it, and took my shower anyway. I knew I didn't have time to light a pilot light then, anyway.

This evening, I had already forgotten. After Martha emerged from the shower, I remembered. "Martha, was your shower warm?"

"Not really, but it wasn't cold either," she said. (I'm hoping she actually TOOK one, but I don't have the energy to care right now)

I think I can safely assume that I'm an intelligent person. I can read instructions and I can figure out what to do -- usually. Not this time, though. Those instructions assumed a certain level of experience on the part of the reader, I think, and I have none. Zero, zip, zilch.

I called the landlord, who lives a few miles south of town, and she sent her husband over to light it for me. I felt very ashamed of myself when I let him in, but then he had all kinds of trouble doing it, too. He fiddled around with a few ideas, and then decided it must be something called a thermal coupling (or it sounded like that's what he said, anyway). He'd be back over tomorrow to get it fixed.

[sigh] I'm sorry he's going to have to deal with it, but I'm relieved that it wasn't my fault.

The hills are STILL alive with the sound of music!!

Or at least with the sound of the vonTrapp descendants, that is.

Young vonTrapp singers ready for their closeup

Four decades after Julie Andrews climbed every mountain and married a widowed naval captain in "The Sound of Music," his real-life great grandchildren are hoping to make movie magic of their own.

The four von Trapp family descendants -- Sofia, 18, Melanie, 16, Amanda, 15, and Justin, 11 -- are taking time off from a world tour as a sibling singing act to star in a Christmas-themed feature film in the works for next year.

Hokey, maybe, but it sounds like fun nonetheless. I'm looking forward to it. Count me in as a die-hard, lifelong fan of The Sound Of Music anyway, I know that real life is far from that fairytale... but it's a nice fairytale anyway. And I'm glad that there are still some members of the family who sing and perform.

Today's English lesson

From Common Errors in English, today I wanted to link to Dr. Paul Brians' FAQ section and quote a little of it:

What is an error in English?

The concept of language errors is a fuzzy one. I'll leave to linguists the technical definitions. Here we're concerned only with deviations from the standard use of English as judged by sophisticated users such as professional writers, editors, teachers, and literate executives and personnel officers. The aim of this site is to help you avoid low grades, lost employment opportunities, lost business, and titters of amusement at the way you write or speak.

But isn't one person's mistake another's standard usage?

Often enough, but if your standard usage causes other people to consider you stupid or ignorant, you may want to consider changing it. You have the right to express yourself in any manner you please, but if you wish to communicate effectively, you should use nonstandard English only when you intend to, rather than fall into it because you don't know any better.

There are times for actual grammar lessons, and then there are the times that a practical usage lesson is better. I've chosen to take a number of Dr. Brians' listings and use them on my blog because I appreciate most of what he has had to say about certain nonstandard usages.

Today's fortune cookie

Some days, these little pieces of paper are pretty dorky and even totally bogus (actually, they're always totally bogus, just because there's no way a little piece of paper baked into a cookie has ANY real relevance to your life -- and don't assume that I believe that they do, just because I post them here. It's just because they're dorky and amusing, is all.).

Occasionally, though, they have a useful, universal-truth kind of point.

Cool video

I just thought this was way cool... a little freaky, I think, too.

Babel comes full circle

Germany is the most recent entrant into the

LANGUAGE PURIST
PANIC ZONE

Achtung, Germans: Denglisch is here to stay

FRANKFURT (Reuters) - It is known as Denglisch, a hybrid of Deutsch and English, and cultural purists say it is an insult to the language of Goethe and should be purged from the vocabulary.

Denglisch has spread steadily as Germans adopted American phrases in business, advertising, technology, and everyday speech. "Brainstorm" has become as common a word in German as "surfen," "chatten," and "shoppen" (for surfing, chatting and shopping).

In Frankfurt, Germany's financial capital, "uptick" and "downturn" are familiar terms and posters listing evening entertainment are headlined "city nacht" (for night).

In Berlin, satirical theater calls itself quatschcomedyclub (quatsch means nonsense) and visitors to the foreign ministry can relax at "The Coffee Shop im Auswaertigen Amt."

"We are colonizing ourselves, voluntarily," complained the German Language Association, a 26,000-strong private group of self-appointed language guardians who want legal protection for the language.

The association has introduced an award for "language adulterer of the year" to shame public figures whom it deems guilty of showing insufficient respect for German.

The leading candidate for this year's prize, to be announced in late August, is Guenther Oettinger, premier of the state of Baden-Wuerttemberg.

His offense? Saying Germany should adopt English as its working language and use German at home and on holiday.

Interestingly, the article delves into the global Anglicization of languages:

Judging from attempts elsewhere to legislate the use of a national language, both English and Denglisch are in Germany to stay.

In 1994, France passed a law meant to suppress Franglais, Denglisch's French cousin. The legislation banned the use of foreign words in work contracts, public announcements, advertising and on radio and television. It said foreign words would have to be replaced by words approved by the Academie Francaise, which serves as watchdog for the French language. The law had little effect on the use of such words as "le weekend" or "le T-shirt" -- denounced as language contaminants by purists.

Americanisms proved similarly resistant to legislation in Poland, where young people embraced English after the collapse of communism and decades of obligatory Russian studies.

But then the article veers into obligatory America-bashing:

"A language becomes an international language for one chief reason -- the political power of its people -- especially their military power," said British linguist David Crystal, whose book "English as a Global Language" is considered a landmark study.

BOGUS!! That is such a load of crap. The language of COMMERCE is what becomes international, not military might. Armies may come and go, but money talks.

The internet has taken over the world, and English is what dominates the internet... particularly the commerce part.

The Francophones and the Deutsche Sprecheren and all the speakers of other beautiful languages (I mean that... I love listening and learning and speaking other languages) are just out of luck on this one... which is a shame, in some respects, because of this possibility:

For those in search of shortcuts, there are rival proposals from India and France for simplified versions of English called Globish.

The Indian version, designed by retired engineer Madhukar Gogate, provides simplified spelling and pronunciation to make learning easier for people unfamiliar with Roman script.

The other Globish is being promoted by a retired IBM executive with a flair for publicity, Jean-Paul Nerriere, whose French-language Web site touts his book "Don't Speak English, parlez Globish."

He proposes a 1,500-word version of English with elementary syntax as "the planetary dialect of the third millennium and integrated solution to the problem of international communication."

Blech. I think that a language suffers when someone tries to engineer it forward. Let it develop... the result will be much more interesting and practical than when some know-it-all invents Esperanto II. We'll all use the words that spring up around the internet, and there will be dialects among internet neighborhoods (leet-speakers and the Pajamahadeen come to mind), but it'll happen on its own. Leave it alone.

And don't stop speaking your own language with your actual neighbors. The more languages you speak, the better off you'll be.

Q!!!

To complete a Star Trek trifecta, here's what Maggie Katzen was referring to:




Dallas Symphony: Beethoven and Schubert

Venue:	Morton H. Meyerson Symphony Center
Address:	2301 Flora St. Suite 100 Dallas, TX 75201
Phone:	214-692-0203
URL:	Dallas Symphony Orchestra
Start Date:	September 14, 2006
End Date:	September 17, 2006

Maestro Claus Peter Flor completes his two-week residency at the Dallas Symphony Orchestra with Beethoven's complete Egmont and Schubert's Symphony N. 9. Actor John deLancie, known to millions as Q on Star Trek: The Next Generation, will narrate the gripping story of the Dutch patriot Egmont, accompanied by Beethoven's powerful music. Also on the program: Schubert's Symphony No. 9, the "Great" C Major Symphony. Schubert admired Beethoven all of his life, and if one listens closely, it's easy to hear Beethoven's influences in what's considered one of Schubert's best works. The Casual Friday concert starts at 7:30pm and has no intermission. Thurs. and Sat. concerts start at 8pm, and Sun. matinee starts at 2:30pm. Tickets range from $15 to $100.

Okay, I promise I'll quit with all the Trek references. Someday soon, anyway. Hey, it's bound to become a problem, since the local cable doesn't carry Sci Fi. And yes, I know, Spike or USA or TNT or some of those networks do carry Trek re-runs. It's probably time to catch a few of them again, since it's been a while.

And in the meantime, I might just have to see about doing a Dallas day next week and trying to catch DeLancie AND do the art museum's Tiffany exhibit.

Today's English lesson

From Common Errors in English:

Irregardless

Regardless of what you have heard, "irregardless" is a redundancy. The suffix "-less" on the end of the word already makes the word negative. It doesn't need the negative prefix "ir-" added to make it even more negative.

Today's fortune cookie

Yes, yes, I know. But procrastination is so much easier.

Where no man has gone before...

Aussie chick gets her PhD with a Star Trek thesis

It may sound like torture for those with an aversion to William Shatner's campy theatrics but, six years and 90,000 words on, it has earned Dr Baker a coveted chancellor's prize for excellence at Melbourne University.

Make it so, Number One! [Picard maneuver]

Don't go there.

Do NOT read this.

[shudder]

Now hiring...

Help Wanted: Organized, compassionate, motivated individual (mind-reading skills a plus) to grade papers and clean house.

The downfall of the Dragon?

Okay, it may not be that drastic... but China's disregard for the environmental impact of its economic expansion may end up biting them in the butt.

Acid rain affects large swathes of China; report

Discharge of sulphur dioxide in booming China rose by 27 percent between 2000 and 2005 to 25 million tonnes, making the country the world's top emitter of the pollutant.

Sheng told lawmakers that China's sulphur dioxide emissions, caused largely by coal-burning power stations and coking plants, were double the acceptable environmental limit.

According to the report's findings, nearly 650 out of 680 coking plants in Shanxi, the country's main coal-mining province, discharged excessive sulphur dioxide, Xinhua said.

Air pollution, caused mainly by sulphur dioxide and particulate matter, was affecting some 40 percent of Chinese cities, Sheng said.

I wonder; did China sign the Kyoto Treaty? Is anyone picketing outside Hu Jintao's house? Somehow I doubt it.

UPDATE: China doesn't have to abide by the Kyoto Treaty. It's a developing country.

NEW YORK (Reuters) - The World Bank put together on Tuesday the largest greenhouse gas deal ever, where European and Asian companies and others will pay two Chinese chemical companies $1.02 billion to reduce output of gases believed to cause global warming.

In the deal, European and Asian companies bound by the U.N.'s Kyoto Protocol to tackle climate change, will pay the Chinese chemical companies to reduce and destroy emissions of HFC23, a heat-trapping gas 11,700 times stronger than carbon dioxide.

The deal will reduce emissions by about 19 million tons of carbon dioxide equivalent annually, according to the World Bank.

About 75 percent of the money to purchase the reductions came from private capital, it said.

Additional participants included entities in World Bank managed funds including the Danish Carbon Fund, the Italian Carbon Fund, Deutsche Bank, Mitsui & Co and two entities of Natsource LLC, which calls itself the world's largest greenhouse gas asset manager.

As a developing country, China, the world's No. 2 producer of greenhouse gases, is not required to reduce emissions of heat trapping gases in the first phase of the international global warming pact the Kyoto Protocol, which runs from 2008 to 2012.

Tuesday's deal was done under Kyoto's Clean Development Mechanism (CDM), which allows rich countries to meet some of their greenhouse gas reduction obligations under the Kyoto Protocol by investing in reductions in developing countries.

Holy smokes... [pun intended]... I'm glad we didn't sign onto Kyoto. It would obligate us to fork over scads of our hard-earned tax dollars to pay off Chinese factory owners. Sheesh.

Dress Code Crackdown

Looks like I'm not the only one who notices the stringent dress code issues... 128 students in Hammond, Indiana got suspended on the first day of school for dress code violations.

I always thought it was rather idiotic at my previous high school job, because they claimed that saggy pants and other sorts of ridiculous attire were prohibited -- but no-one was ever sent home that I know of. Sagging was the norm, and the only time anyone was ever spoken-to about it was if their long baggy white t-shirt didn't quite cover their boxer shorts. Once, one of my male students came to me to ask if I had anything he could use to tie up his pants because his belt had broken. All I had was green yarn, so that's what he used.

I don't understand why gangland folks would want to wear such cumbersome clothing... it was always quite humorous to see a young man trying to run down a hall while holding up his pants, and I can't imagine that anyone would be able to run from the cops in such attire.

I only hope that some day there will be a Teacher Dress Like Students day at school, because I'll show up wearing a tall-tee and gold chains and some major saggy pants. Of course, that might freak out the clientele of North Ruralville High School, yanno?

Today's English lesson

From Common Errors in English:

Set Phasers To Stun!

Faze means to embarrass or disturb, but is almost always used in the negative sense, as in:

"The fact that the overhead projector bulb was burned out didn't faze her."

Phase is a noun or verb having to do with an aspect of something:

"He's just going through a temperamental phase."

"They're going to phase in the new accounting procedures gradually."

Unfortunately, Star Trek has confused matters by calling its ray pistols phasers. Too bad they aren't fazers instead.

Today's fortune cookie

Texas Rangers vs. Oakland

Pop took us to a Rangers game in Arlington tonight for Isaac's birthday. He got us AWESOME seats just a few rows up from the Rangers' dugout... got a nice view of Teixeira at first base for a good bit of the game. Saw a spectacular double play grab by shortstop Michael Young (my personal fave), and even though the Rangers didn't come out on top, we had a fantastic time.

Today's English lesson

From Common Errors in English:

Catch-22

People familiar with Joseph Heller's novel are irritated when they see "Catch-22" used to label any simple hitch or problem rather than this sort of circular dilemma: you can't get published until you have an agent, and you can't get an agent until you've been published. "There's a catch" will do fine for most other situations.

Today's fortune cookie

Moo, y'all!

Apparently, cows moo in their own regional dialects. Who knew?

So let's think about this.

Canadian cows: Moooo-eh!
Philly cows: Moo, dere!
Georgia cows: Moouw!
Minnesota cows: Moof-da!

Any other suggestions?

"You say it's your birthday!"

Happy Birthday to my lil' Buddy Boy!!

I can't believe you're already seven years old.

And I can't believe it was seven years ago that I first heard the words, "It's a BOY!" and thought I was in the Twilight Zone, since they'd told me I was having a girl. Ha ha! I'm glad you were YOU and not anyone else... you're a very cool kid and I'm glad God let me be your Mommy!

Today's English lesson

Loan Me Your Ears?

From EnglishPlus:

In standard English, lend is a verb, and loan is a noun.

Nonstandard: Please loan us a hundred dollars.

Standard: Please lend us a hundred dollars.

This is one error that really irritates me... "Loan me a dollar," I usually hear from people. If it's one of my kids saying it, I always always always correct it.

Today's fortune cookie

Clean stupid

Okay, maybe I'm a bad mom for saying that, but can someone please explain to me WHAT the deal is with pre-teen girls not wanting to take a shower and doing any- and everything possible to weasel out of it???

Just found out that the Drama Queen has been running the shower and just getting her hair wet to make it seem like she was showering.

WTF?!?!?

I threatened to sit in the bathroom and watch her. Please GOD, please don't let that be the solution. I don't want to.

But I will if I have to.

[insert inappropriate language]

The DQ will be the eventual cause of my institutionalization, I'm certain. Either that, or you're gonna see my name on the crawlstrip on FOXnews:

NBENET...TEXAS MOM AT CENTER OF SPONTANEOUS COMBUSTION MYSTERY... USAMA FOUN

UPDATE: The tearful explanation? "I'm just not comfortable," she moaned. "Other people have used that shower!"

How many more years of this do I endure?

Don't answer that.

Seven years ago I was...

Yet another meme; this one I saw on LaShawn's blog last Friday.

Seven years ago TODAY ... about three hours from now, actually... I went into labor while sitting at the computer IMing with a girlfriend from California.

But just seven years ago in general? Here's seven things I experienced in 1999:

1. Alice learned to walk and talk.
2. I was pregnant, had an ultrasound to determine that I was having a girl, then delivered a BOY by cesarean section after 22 hours of labor.
3. Our house was broken into while we were gone on vacation; our TV, stereo, VCR, pole fans, and a handmade quilt were all stolen. They didn't touch my iMac.
4. We housed a very cool summer missionary named Keri.
5. Ginormous family reunion on Memorial Day weekend in Ada, Oklahoma.
6. I had postpartum depression. It's definitely real, and Tom Cruise is a blithering idiot.
7. I began a Yahoo Groups e-mail list for women who had undergone obesity surgery and who were considering becoming pregnant (or already were); that list now has well over 3,000 members.

How about you? What were YOU doing seven years ago?

Today's English lesson

I'm nothing if not responsive to my audience...

From Common Errors In English:

Not At All!

Some of us are irritated when a grocery checker asks "Do you want any help out with that at all?"

At all is traditionally used in negative contexts: "Can't you give me any help at all?"

The current pattern of using the phrase in positive offers of help unintentionally suggests aid reluctantly given or minimal in extent.

As a way of making yourself sound less polite than you intend, it ranks right up there with "no problem" instead of "you're welcome."

You're welcome.

Today's fortune cookie

Buyer's remorse...

It may be coming soon for me. I just bought Martha a clarinet on eBay; she's in beginning Band now and says she wants to play the clarinet. Renting it would cost twenty-five bucks a month, which we just don't have. The one I just bought for her isn't going to set the world on fire, but I'm hoping it will be a decent enough student model to carry her through junior high and/or high school Band.

This also means that we get to listen to the squeaks and squawks and honks and wheezes of a beginning Band student. I can't believe my own parents put up with my oboe-playing in those early days; it had to be a terribly grating experience.

Evidence Of The Invisible

Dark Matter -- it's real! Or so says a group of scientists at the University of Arizona.

Using orbiting telescopes, the researchers watched two giant gas clouds in outer space collide over a 100-hour period. As the clouds clashed, they said, the visible gas particles slowed, pulling away from the invisible dark matter particles.

The researchers said they could detect the dark matter particles by their gravitational pull on the surrounding visible particles.

"This is the first time we've been able to show that (dark matter) has to be out there, that you can't explain it away," Clowe told Reuters. "We haven't actually been able to see the dark matter particles themselves, but what we have been able to do is... image the gravity that they're generating."

I'll be interested to see what the particle-physics people come up with to explain this invisible stuff.

Soccer Obsession

Some people just get too "into" the game.

A funny

I was reading a blog post from someone (her name is Jackie Passey) I'm just not interested in linking, because she's obnoxious and unbelievably self-centered, but she said something funny.

She mentioned that "Irony is when you're closing down various browser windows and discover that one of them is an ADHD website you were reading several hours ago before you got sidetracked."

Ha!!

UPDATE: Even more ridiculous... I was just checking my own open browser windows and discovered that I had typed this post two hours ago (at 8 PM) but hadn't published it... I got distracted and forgot. Sheesh.

The Fertility Gap

Apparently liberals aren't having enough kids, and it's affecting election outcomes.

On the political left, raising the youth vote is one of the most common goals. This implicitly plays to the tired old axiom that a person under 30 who is not a liberal has no heart (whereas one who is still a liberal after 30 has no head). The trouble is, while most "get out the vote" campaigns targeting young people are proxies for the Democratic Party, these efforts haven't apparently done much to win elections for the Democrats. The explanation we often hear from the left is that the new young Democrats are more than counterbalanced by voters scared up by the Republicans on "cultural issues" like abortion, gun rights and gay marriage.

But the data on young Americans tell a different story. Simply put, liberals have a big baby problem: They're not having enough of them, they haven't for a long time, and their pool of potential new voters is suffering as a result. According to the 2004 General Social Survey, if you picked 100 unrelated politically liberal adults at random, you would find that they had, between them, 147 children. If you picked 100 conservatives, you would find 208 kids. That's a "fertility gap" of 41%. Given that about 80% of people with an identifiable party preference grow up to vote the same way as their parents, this gap translates into lots more little Republicans than little Democrats to vote in future elections. Over the past 30 years this gap has not been below 20%--explaining, to a large extent, the current ineffectiveness of liberal youth voter campaigns today.

Or perhaps the babies they are making are more likely to get murdered in the womb before they ever see the light of day?

Hmmm.

Today's English lesson

From EnglishPlus:

Anxious or Eager?

Anxious, like anxiety, implies worrying, or being afraid about something. It means "uneasy" or "apprehensive."

Eager means "enthusiastic."

Examples: I am eager to see Uncle George again.
(I am enthusiastic, positive about it.)

I am anxious about the upcoming layoffs.
(I am uneasy, negative about them.)

Today's fortune cookie

La cucaracha! La cucaracha!

Just now I went into my bedroom and noticed Bijou sniffing around my suitcase on the floor. I watched her for a moment, then saw something dark scurry away.

Dear God, please let that be a cricket.

I knew it wasn't a cricket, though, because it didn't move like a cricket.

I scooted my suitcase and La Giganta Cucaracha scurried out.

GAH!!! I grabbed a sandal and began hunting. It scrambled in and out, and went under my suitcase. I picked up my suitcase and upended it. No cockroach. I turned over clothes baskets. No cockroach. Then I looked at my suitcase itself. La Cucaracha was clinging surreptitiously to the dark underside of the suitcase. Perfect! I smacked her hard with my sandal and she fell, twitching, to the floor.

[shudder] I wonder how long it will take before I finally grow accustomed to the idea of bugs in the house again? I'm just not used to it, and it gives me a bit of a freakout when I encounter one. Thank goodness there haven't been many.

Rick, you'd be proud of me. I've even killed some large-ish members of the arachnid family. The only thing that motivates me to do it is this two-fold truth: 1) I'm the only one who can, and 2) If I don't, the creature will still be in my house and I won't know where it is. That, I canNOT bear.

I'm going to ruffle a couple of feathers by saying this...

I think pregnant high-school girls should be segregated into an alternate education program. They can't always follow dress code, as the article points out, but I think that a strict dress code in high school is a beneficial thing.

Actually, it's a toss-up for me. Either allow everything -- facial hair, grills, piercings and tattoos, low-cut clothing -- or allow none of it. I can work within either system, but the halfway stuff doesn't cut it with me. If I had my 'druthers, I'd rather be in the strict system. I think that a seriously strict policy brings with it a sense of obligation on the part of students and a compulsion to follow the rules.

Here in North Ruralville, I was stunned on the first day of school to discover the extent to which they regulate students' appearances. Boys' hair must be no lower than their ear-level, and no boy can have any piercing of any kind. Girls may only have pierced earlobes, nothing further. Clothing must fit properly (no sagging, no skin-tights) and if I (as a teacher) disapprove of something someone's wearing, I have the right to send them out.

It does seem to make a difference, though. I'm sure it's not the sole reason for the difference, but there is very little nonsense tolerated in this school. And even the most annoying criminal element tends to obey without too much backtalk. Quite refreshing, really.

Origami chess set?

Yep.

A kid from Iowa won a blue ribbon at the Iowa State Fair with her origami chess set.

Pierce, 16, daughter of Jim and Peggy Pierce of West Des Moines, became interested in origami when she completed a fourth-grade class assignment to create 1,000 paper cranes. Since then, the Waukee High School junior has tackled dozens of projects, including creating a turtle, a castle, a dragon and last year's Dallas County Fair entry, a modular, spherical kusudama ball, a type of paper flower ball.

I'd be inclined to think this girl just has too much time on her hands, but I'd be wrong.

Pierce, who is the drum major for the Waukee High School band, is also involved in the vocal music program, plays the piano and the clarinet and plans to start taking bagpipe lessons this fall.

She enjoys demonstrating her origami-making skills for schoolchildren and at tractor shows, but so far has been unwilling to sell any of the creations.

Although she hasn't chosen her next project yet, she's biding her time by challenging herself to see just how small she can fold those paper cranes. The ones she first learned to make had a wing span of 3 to 4 inches. She's now crafting cranes, with the same number of folds, with an-inch wingspan.

"I'm folding with tweezers and a magnifying glass," she says. "I want to see just how small I can go."

Even better, I'd be willing to lay odds she's got ADD:

A known procrastinator, Pierce left herself a few days to create her chess set before the county fair.

"That's just the way she is," said Jim Pierce. "She's a full-throttle kid. When she gets into something, she does it."

Kelly Pierce said she works best with a deadline. "I don't settle for halfway, even if I have half the time."

I've always worked that way, myself. It's just how I am.

Any-hoo, congratulations to Miss Pierce... that's absolutely cool.

Today's English lesson

From EnglishPlus:

Infinite Splitsville

Infinitives are normally made up of two words--the word to followed by a verb in the present tense. Some stylists say that to "split" the infinitives, that is, to place a modifier between the to and the verb is bad grammar. But sometimes it is the perfect place to put an adverb.

Most European languages, including Latin, have single-word infinitives. Many grammatical terms and rules do come from Latin. Some people thought that since it was impossible to divide a Latin infinitive, that we should avoid it in English even though our infinitives consist of two words instead of one.

A writer can confuse the reader if the to and the verb are separated by a long phrase or clause. This is true. But in English it is appropriate to thoughtfully place an adverb between the two parts of the infinitive.

Some editorial guidelines, especially in England, still insist on this "rule."

Today's fortune cookie

Wedding bells are ringin'

For my cousin in Oklahoma City... and I'm actually going to get to be at this one, since I live so much closer. Yippeeee!! It's this afternoon, so I gotta run along and finish getting ready. I prolly won't be blogging again 'til tomorrow.

Y'all behave while I'm gone, k?

Today's English lesson

From EnglishPlus:

A or An?

The article a is used before consonant sounds; an is used before vowel sounds.

Words beginning with h, o and u sometimes begin with a vowel sound, sometimes a consonant sound.

Consonant Sound:

a heroic couplet (h sound)

a once-happy lover (w sound)

a universal problem (y sound)

Vowel Sound:

an honest man (no h sound)

an only child (o sound)

an unusual insect (u sound)

Today's fortune cookie

Too tired to think

Right at this particular moment, I'm wondering what in the world I was thinking when we made the decision to move back to Texas.

I am so tired I can hardly move.

I have so much to do that I can't slow down.

Too many details, not enough dedicated brain cells.

I was not meant for single motherhood.

[to no-one in particular] I wonder if they sell lecterns on Amazon? I think I'll go check. I need a big lectern and a tall captain's chair in my classroom. I suppose I could hunt around at some of the local junk stores, but who has the time? I don't even know if they have a shop class; if they have carpentry tools, I suppose I could ask them to build me a lectern as a class project.

Time to get some more grading done. If I can keep my eyes open, that is.

UPDATE: Yep. Amazon does sell lecterns. This one seems a bit simplistic for $200, though... I'll bet I can find a nicer one for less. But this is the general idea I was hoping for.

Today's English lesson

From EnglishPlus:

Prepositional Madness

The word preposition was coined because such words normally precede the position of their objects in a prepositional phrase. Some people then took this definition to mean that a preposition always had to come before its object and, surely, could never end a sentence.

This "rule" does not always apply when a subordinate comes before a preposition. British and Americans agree that one twentieth-century figure who demonstrated excellent command of English in speech and writing was Sir Winston Churchill. Once, when he worked for the Admiralty in World War I, he was rebuked by a superior for putting a preposition at the end of a sentence. He replied by writing back an ironic apology saying that it was "the sort of English up with which I will not put." Of course, that was much more awkward than "something I will not put up with." He made his point.

Some editorial guidelines, especially in England, still call for this "rule," but it is passing.

Today's fortune cookie

Squeezing blood from a turnip

States Fall Short On Teacher Quality

WASHINGTON (AP) - Having missed one deadline already, states still face an enormous challenge in putting qualified teachers in all major classes, a federal review says.

Some states are in much better shape than others, the Education Department said Wednesday. Most meet only some criteria in required new plans. Four fail altogether.

Under the No Child Left Behind law, states were supposed to have highly qualified teachers in every core academic class by the end of the last school year. None made it.

So the Education Department demanded new state plans. They were to include details on how states would improve their teaching corps and ensure fairness for poor and minority children.

The federal analysis of those plans yields a mixed picture.

Most states got credit for showing serious effort. Yet a few were ordered to start over. Every state was given specific recommendations and told to follow them.

...

Meanwhile, for parents and students, more patience will be required. The new goal is 100 percent compliance by the end of the 2006-07 school year, but some states may be years away.

Most of the states -- 37 of them, plus the District of Columbia and Puerto Rico -- met only some of the criteria. They must submit new data or plans this fall or risk facing penalties.

Four states failed altogether: Hawaii, Missouri, Utah and Wisconsin. They must submit new plans and undergo monthly auditing of their teacher quality data, the department says.

The remaining nine states got favorable reviews for handing in complete plans and creative ideas about how they will improve. Those nine are Kansas, Louisiana, Maryland, New Jersey, New Mexico, Nevada, Ohio, South Carolina and South Dakota.

South Carolina, for example, was praised for paying incentives to teachers in high-need schools. Louisiana was credited for collecting clear, meaningful data on teacher quality.

All the plans were examined by outside review teams, mainly state officials.

"We're pretty hopeful that if states seriously implement these plans -- and we intend to monitor that -- then change will happen," said Rene Islas, chief of staff for the department's elementary and secondary education office.

The promise of better teachers is a huge part of President Bush's education law. Every new development, though, underscores how daunting the mission is.

The law defines "highly qualified" teachers as those who have a bachelor's degree, a state license and proven competency in every subject they teach. It is often regarded as a minimum qualification, because it requires teachers to know what they teach.

Many teachers find the edict to be well intentioned but poorly defined. It does not measure attributes parents like, such as a teacher's creativity or ability to reach students.

The law also orders equity, a point gaining more attention of late. Poor and minority kids are not supposed to have an unfair share of unqualified, inexperienced teachers.

The Education Trust, which advocates for underprivileged children, says states largely ignored the provision in their new plans. The group issued its own analysis last week. It found that most states are doing little to fix inequities in the teaching force.

Department officials acknowledged Wednesday that equity was the biggest snag for states. Many states couldn't provide data on the quality of teachers serving poor and minority kids.

The department can withhold money from states that fall short on teacher quality.

Based on a separate review earlier this year, seven states, the District of Columbia and Puerto Rico face the loss of federal aid if they don't improve their compliance.

Those states are Idaho, Iowa, Missouri, Montana, Nebraska, Virginia and Washington.

I just think it's fascinating to stand back and watch as districts scramble to find teachers -- warm bodies, even -- to cover burgeoning classrooms... there just aren't enough of these warm bodies who have teaching certificates. Start paying teachers a little better, and you might eventually have a few more people choosing an education career. For now, however, you're requiring a professional-level degree from someone you're paying minimum wage. I dare you to find enough "highly qualified" people in the country who will sign up for this.

Loss of federal funding? Hoo! We should be so lucky... except if the Feds withdraw their funding of Big Brother Education, they won't give us back our tax dollars that they took away. I'd be all for the abolishment of the Dept of Ed, especially if it meant that people got to keep more of their tax dollars. They'd spend more, which would fund local sales taxes, which would fund local schools.

As for the ninnies who scream that poor districts would be left behind, I would like to mention that dollars spent per pupil does not equal better test scores.

It's a gigantic house of cards, and I predicted some time ago that it would eventually cave in under its own weight. That may be happening.

First Day Of School, redux

Several years ago my mom had cut a comic strip panel from the paper and put it up in her kitchen, and we all had a chuckle over it. It was a teacher standing in front of a classroom of youngsters and she was calling roll, and all the kids' names were "Wild West"-type names like Cheyenne, Dakota, etc. The list included most of the commonest ones, then ended up with a couple of humorous ones like "Wild Bill" and "Buffalo Gal." It was obviously poking sly fun at the trendy-ness of those sorts of names.

Well, that group of kindergarteners has entered high school. Calling roll sounds very much like that comic strip... I had to smother a smirk several times.

My six classes went as pleasantly as one might expect. They were full of clean-cut, wholesome kiddos, all of whom I'm pretty sure I'll grow to like very much. This is going to be a nice change of pace.

I think my main challenge will be keeping up with grades. The computer program they use here for grades has far fewer "bells and whistles" than the one we used in the Des Moines district... I got pretty spoiled. At least they've got computers, though... when I taught in Texas 13 years ago I didn't even have computers in my classroom. Oh, wait... yes, we had a couple of computers and we were using DOS on them. I snuck in a bootleg copy of Windows 3.1 and installed it on them. Nothing was networked, of course, and the internet was a distant hum on the horizon.

My own three chilluns had a splendid day today. When school was over, they were able to ride a bus from the elementary school over to the high school, which was highly convenient for me. A few minutes after they arrived, my own lil' JoeMama herself arrived to see how everyone's day had gone. She had brought a roast chicken for supper and the makins for some chocolate no-bake cookies. I needed to make a run to Office Depot for some classroom supplies, and we needed a few things at the grocery store, so we dashed over to Sherman before coming back home for supper.

I fried some fresh okra for myself (the kids don't care for it).

It's been a lovely day.

I sure do need someone to come over and mow my yard, though. The recent rains have brought the scrubby weeds back to life and they're all looking lush and thick again.

First Day Of School

Okay, here we go...

Today's English lesson

From EnglishPlus:

Lay or Lie?

Lay means "to place something down." It is something you do to something else. It is a transitive verb.

Incorrect: Lie the book on the table.

Correct: Lay the book on the table.
(It is being done to something else.)

Lie means "to recline" or "be placed." It does not act on anything or anyone else. It is an intransitive verb.

Incorrect: Lay down on the couch.

Correct: Lie down on the couch.
(It is not being done to anything else.)

The reason lay and lie are confusing is their past tenses.

The past tense of lay is laid.

The past tense of lie is lay.

Incorrect: I lay it down here yesterday.

Correct: I laid it down here yesterday.
(It is being done to something else.)

Incorrect: Last night I laid awake in bed.

Correct: Last night I lay awake in bed.
(It is not being done to anything else.)

The past participle of lie is lain. The past participle of lay is like the past tense, laid.

Examples:

I could have lain in bed all day.

They have laid an average of 500 feet of sewer line a day.

Layed is a misspelling and does not exist. Use laid.

Today's fortune cookie

Today's English lesson

From EnglishPlus:

Aggravate or Irritate?

Aggravate mean "to make worse." The root is grave, in the sense of "serious." Remember this root when spelling the word.

Irritate means "to exasperate" or "to inflame."

Incorrect: His teasing aggravated me.

Correct: His teasing irritated me.

Incorrect: That meal irritated my condition.

Correct: That meal aggravated my condition.

Today's fortune cookie

Produce!

Images from the Dallas Farmer's Market. After Alice's appointment at Children's Hospital, we went downtown to the Farmer's Market to pick up some yummy produce. Here's some images for you, so you may share my experience.

I heart nanotech!!

Some cool stuff that nanotech is doing for you

In the future, nanotechnology may be used to make bulletproof vests as thin as silk, and nano-robots that can enter your bloodstream to treat disease. But sci-fi inventions like these are still at least a decade in the future, according to nanotech scientist James Tour, who works on building nano-cars at Rice University in Houston.

For now, Tour said, the makers of consumer goods are mostly using the technology to enhance commonplace products. "This type of nanotechnology is upon us now," he said. "You can revolutionize industries that haven't changed much in the last 30 years by adding certain nano-materials" to products to make them more durable or multifunctional.

The technology is not very expensive, and getting cheaper, Tour said, so consumers can expect to encounter it at work more often in everyday products. For now, here are ten places to look:

1. Golf balls and tennis racquets: Manufacturers are always looking for the best new design to improve your score, but this sports equipment is truly high tech. Wilson previously made its nCode tennis racquets of standard carbon, but now uses nanotechnology to pack extra atoms between the carbon atoms to make the racquets stronger, but just as light. A nano-coating on NDliNX golf balls is meant to make them soar faster and feel firmer when hit, thanks to a higher-density polymer layer on the outside of the ball.
2. Stain-resistant khaki pants and ties: Ever wonder how those so-called stain resistant pants stay so clean? Dockers, Lands End and Brooks Brothers carry khaki pants and neckties whose fabrics have been redesigned to pack extra atoms between the fabric atoms to help repel liquids on the surface.
3. Shoe inserts and socks: Suffer from cold feet? Originally designed for NASA, Polarwrap has created its Toasty Feet inserts with built-in nano-size pockets of air to improve insulation and make them lightweight. Millions of nano-size silver particles are knitted into Sharper Image's Antibacterial Silver Athletic and Lounging Socks to make them antibacterial and antifungal.
4. Lip gloss: DERMAdoctor cosmetics puts nano-size zinc-oxide into its POUTlandish Hypermoist lip paint for SPF protection without the heavy consistency of liquid sunblock.
5. Sportswear: Nano-size channels built into fabrics whisk away moisture from the skin and help fabric dry quickly. The New Balance women's Skye Crop sports bra uses this technology. Eddie Bauer's Water Shorts use nano-size drying channels as well, with nano-size sunscreen embedded in the fabric to provide extra protection from UV rays.
6. Food storage containers: These plastic containers are not your mother's Tupperware. The polypropylene of Fresherlonger Miracle Storage containers is infused with nano-size silver particles that make it resistant to mold, fungus and bacteria.
7. Men's razors: The FX Diamond razor uses nanotechnology to create a coating on its blades to make them more durable. Adding nano-particles to the blade metal increases the density, and thus the hardness. The Panasonic Arc electronic razor uses nano-particles in its blades to increase their sharpness.
8. Skin cream: Both L'Oreal and Lancome use nano-size "microlifters" in some of their face and eye wrinkle-reducing creams. These create a micro-size netting of molecules on the skin intended to smooth out wrinkles and reduce puffiness.
9. Household paint: Home Depot carries Behr's kitchen and bathroom paint, designed with nano-particles that increase the density of the paint to prevent the growth of mold and mildew on the walls.
10. Canola oil: Marketed in Israel by Shemen Industries, the Canola Active brand uses molecular tinkering to deliver vitamins and to prevent the body's absorption of cholesterol in the oil. The oil contains chemical additives of micro-vitamins and micro-cholesterol blockers.

I can't wait to see what "molecular tinkering" will do for us in the future... the possibilities seem endless.

Put a burqa over this kid! Quick!

Does this photograph offend you?

No?

Apparently it offended someone in a passport application office in the UK, who told the little girl's mother that they were rejecting this photo for little Hannah's passport because her shoulders are bare and it might offend someone in a Muslim country.

I kid you not.

Here's the article:

Passport photo of girl, 5, banned 'in case it offends Muslims'

Hannah Edwards's mother Jane, a Sheffield GP, was told that her daughter's exposed skin may be considered offensive in a Muslim country.

The photograph was taken in a booth at a local post office for a family trip to the south of France.

However, when the family presented it at the post office with the completed form, they were told it would not be accepted by the Passport Office.

Mrs Edwards said she was furious when a woman behind the counter said she was aware of at least two other applications that had been rejected because a person's shoulders were not covered.

...

A spokesman for the Identity and Passport Service said it was not its policy to reject applications with bare shoulders.

"Our offices have a Passport Office template which says which says what the photograph should and shouldn't be. Bare shoulders don't come into that at all.

"It is the first time we have heard of such a rejection and we will take it up with that particular office."

Is this planet becoming Islamicized right under our noses? Sure seems like it to me.