Friday, February 16, 2007

Skeered outta my skin

Yesterday (Thursday) during the last class period of the day, the intercom called eight boys out of class to come to the office. I knew each of the boys, of course, and I knew that the one thing they all had in common was...



Yes, at North Ruralville High School, it is school policy to require all boys to have their hair cut reasonably short and over the ears. It's not a popular policy among the Emos, the Artists, and the Stoners, as you might imagine.

When I heard the announcement, I grabbed my camera and headed down to the office. When they filed back out into the hallway, I rounded them up and had them pose for a group photo. I'm fairly popular with most groups (except the Cowboys, for some reason, but none of them wear their hair long, so they don't figure into this story at all), so they were all glad to pose for me.

I printed the photo on the black-and-white laser printer, then created a large "WANTED DEAD OR ALIVE" poster with the photo affixed squarely in the middle. "EIGHT LONG-HAIRED GALOOTS, UNARMED AND VERY DANGEROUS" etc... I thought it was rather humorous, myself. Anyhoo, when I was finished, I propped it onto the worktable in the teacher workroom and left it (unsigned) for everyone to find the next morning. I knew it wouldn't be a huge secret who'd done it, of course, because I'm the artsy creative one in the bunch.

A few teachers stopped me in the hall this morning to tell me how funny they thought it was. I had a pretty busy day planned, so I didn't stop by the office or anything. During third period, the principal showed up at my classroom door and pulled me aside out in the hall.

"Did you think that was funny?" he demanded, a stricken expression on his face.

I felt all the blood drain from my face. "I... I... I didn't mean anything bad, sir," I stammered. "I'll go get it and get rid of it if it offends you." I thought I was going to be sick.

He chewed on me a little further and I literally thought I would lose bowel control on the spot. Then he suddenly grinned and laughed out loud. "That's the funniest thing I think I've seen all year," he chuckled. "I'm going to put that up in my office and have those boys come by and SIGN it."

"If you'd kept going much longer, I would've had to go home and change britches," I said. He laughed again.

I'm hoping that means good things as far as my having finally been "accepted" into the bunch, so to speak.

And as for the hair issue, of course, I don't personally care how anyone wears their hair, since hair is (in my opinion) NOT a moral issue. But I will uphold the school rules since I am an employee of the district. And hey... there are some cases where long hair just shouldn't be allowed to exist... take this guy, for instance:

That is just nasty. Nasty and wrong.

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