Seems like my emotional highs often precede precipitous drops.
Yesterday was a hugely awesome day, musically. I felt really confident on the keys, I didn't botch anything too badly during any of the services, and we did cool songs that turned out well. Also, Rick and the kids looked great in the clothes I'd gotten for them. The weather was outstandingly gorgeous.
This morning I awoke at 4 AM in a cold sweat, with enormous waves of fear and panic and despair and ultimate acts gripping my mind like a giant python. I prayed and tossed until 4:30, then got up to take a shower and prayed some more. I don't really think it had all that much to do with school starting back up this morning after Spring Break, because school never causes me that much stress... but I do know this -- I was attacked viciously by an unseen enemy this morning and I'm still reeling a little and feeling a little shaky.
I'll be okay. It'll just take some time. I have always been somewhat prone to wild emotional swings, but they've been fewer and further between as I've gotten older. I don't normally go this far down, though. I'm going to spend a lot of time talking to God today.
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