Thursday, April 09, 2015

Love/Hate Relationship With This State

I really, really, really love Texas. And in the spring, when everything blooms, it's so beautiful I can hardly even bear it.


I took this photo of our state flower, Lupinus texensis, last weekend in Azle, Texas. They're known more famously by their common name: BLUEBONNETS.

They're beautiful. And they're finicky. Notoriously finicky.

You want a yard full of them? Good luck with that.

You see, bluebonnets prefer well-drained places that are untouched, unmowed, un-stepped-on, un-anything. Texans want to grow them in their yards, and they are consistently foiled in this endeavor. These rascally little plants want to bloom in places nobody messes with.

And I'll just 'fess up right here -- my mother is the only human on this earth who has successfully gotten bluebonnets to grow in her yard -- at least, the only human I know personally.

But it was only in flowerbeds that she LEFT ALONE.

Bluebonnets do not like to be messed-with. EVER.

Texas A&M horticulture peeps have successfully created maroon-colored bluebonnets, but they have yet to breed bluebonnets that grow readily in flowerbeds. So, um, good luck with that. Let me know how that works out for you.

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In the next couple of weeks, at my school, they'll be handing out next year's contracts. I will freely admit to anyone who cares to read this blog that I will never NOT be fearful of not being offered a contract for the next year. NEVER. I've seen bloodbaths in school districts and in churches and in so many different workplaces, and it means I never take my job for granted. I don't necessarily think that's a bad thing, though... it's always a good idea to be wise about one's job. But in the end, I fully know that God is in charge, and that if I am on the receiving end of an administrative house-cleaning, it's not personal. I trust God to take care of me and my family, and if He wants me to seek employment elsewhere, He will show me what He wants me to do.

Yeah, you atheists can mock. But He does tell me what He wants. Seriosuly. He really does.

And if He wants me to pick up my family and move thousands of miles away, He knows I am not afraid to do that.

And if He wants me to bloom where I'm planted, He knows I'm also completely willing to do that, too.

I love Valley View. I really do. I love the people here, I love the school, I love the community. I'd like to feel like it's my "forever home"... but I'm also fully aware of how capricious politics can be. And I'm not "rocked" by that realization.

I think that being the wife of a pastor helped me develop this understanding... Southern Baptist churches are autonomous, you see... there is no "hierarchy" in the SBC... at least not where individual churches are concerned... so if your husband is the pastor of a local SB church, you always keep the knowledge handy that you can be "canned" in a heartbeat if the deacons or the personnel committee decide it's time for you to go away... it isn't wonderful, but it's how things work... and because I (as a serious Christian who loves Jesus and who trusts Him completely) take whatever comes and try to listen to God... it means that whenever there's an employment upheaval, I take it in stride and trust God to show me and Rick what we need to do next.

I'm probably OK with regard to my current job. That's according to school board members who have communicated privately with me. But nonetheless I take absolutely NOTHING for granted. I'm ready in the "twinkling of an eye" to go wherever He tells us to go.. God knows our hearts, and He knows what we're willing to sacrifice for Him. He knows that our children are completely on board with whatever. So it's okay, regardless.

It's always nice to find out FOR SURE. But living the life of a sold-out Christian may mean we don't always know something FOR SURE. I'm okay with that. And from what I know of living with my husband for twenty-five years, he's of the same mind.

BRING IT. We're on board.

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