Thursday, February 01, 2007

Evil skwerl strikes again

Squirrel bites the hand that feeds him

LYNCHBURG, Va. A college student in Lynchburg is undergoing rabies shots after being bitten by a squirrel with a taste for snack bars.

Audrey Hudgins, a sophomore at Randolph-Macon Woman's College from Durham, North Carolina, says she was sitting on a bench on campus Tuesday when a squirrel crawled up her leg and sat in her lap.

To Hudgins' surprise, the squirrel -- known as an infamous chowhound named Toby -- snatched a piece of the strawberry Nutri-Grain bar she was holding. But Toby went back for a second bite and locked on, biting through Hudgins' right thumbnail.

She tried to unlatch Toby by beating it against the bench. The squirrel let go, then grabbed the Nutri-Grain bar that Hudgins had dropped during the struggle, and ran off.

She's taking a series of rabies shots as a precaution.

School officials sent an e-mail to students on Tuesday about the snack bar showdown.

The e-mail's subject line? "Please don't feed the squirrels."

DUH! Because skwerls are STOOPID and EVIL and nasty little varmints, that's what. Plain and simple. Just because they LOOK cute doesn't mean they have the slightest idea what you mean by offering it a treat from your hand. It's just a great big GERBIL with a fluffy tail, and it will BITE YOU.

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