I didn't really have one of those... it wasn't wonderful, but it wasn't the worst day I've ever had. But I'm feeling completely desolate and discouraged and disheartened. Kind-of a "I hate everyone and everything" kind of feeling.
There's really no coherent reason for my mood. I did get another e-mail from one of Martha's teachers, but it wasn't earth-shatteringly horrible. I did have a stoopid meeting to attend during my planning time, and it truly was about as discouraging and horrid as any meeting has ever been just because we continue to try to tell the people in higher-up positions in the district that our school is breaking the law by not serving students according to their IEPs and that every time we suggest some sort of solution it gets shot down without even a review or a discussion. We're sick of fighting, sick of talking, sick of listening to people drone on and on about how to improve student achievement when we're being forced to be teacher's-aides in other teachers' classrooms and have NO say over what gets taught and when and how. It's completely demoralizing.
Okay, yes, there was that part of the day, and yes, I suppose it has colored my entire afternoon/evening. I can't keep my supper down because my stomach has tightened up into a knot. My hand hurts. A lot. My laundry needs doing. The first thing my husband said when he came through the door was something about the credit-card statement (is a "Hey, it's nice to see you at the end of my workday" too much to ask for?). Of course, maybe it ISN'T nice to see me. Maybe I'm stupid and ugly and lazy and nobody in their right mind would want to come home to me.
I feel like breaking things and swearing.
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