Thursday, October 13, 2005

Conference Time

School conference time! That always used to strike dread in my heart, even though I was a good student. I was just always so afraid of disappointing someone. Also, I've always been the kind of person who kept my "worlds" separate -- school, home, church, they were all different places, and if people from one place invaded one of my other places, it was very disorienting for me. Conferences were like that for me... my parents coming into this world of mine where they didn't quite belong. Nerve-wracking, it was.

Isaac's teacher said he was doing great... no surprises there. She did relate one humorous incident. She began to notice that everyone's grades began improving dramatically, and realized that while she had taken one group aside to work with them, Isaac was "working" with all the other groups. She had a talk with him about how to give help without giving away the answers.

No surprises in any of the conferences, really.



I did not throw up today, which was a good thing. It really does seem to last just two or three days when it happens. I'm thankful it doesn't happen any oftener than every two or three months. It's normal, from what I understand, for people who underwent my kind of stomach surgery, even years and years out from it like I am. There are lots of people in lots worse shape than me. Having stomach surgery is effective, but it does not come without cost.



Alice has another EEG tomorrow morning at 7 AM. It's then that we'll see whether all this powerful medication is doing anything to alleviate her invisible seizures. Rick is taking her this time around; we're both off work tomorrow, which is an extreme rarity. I'm going to sleep, first of all, and then I'm going to go through clothing and make the switch to the fall/winter stuff. [sigh]



SoulFire got together to practice tonight, but ended up just talking and praying together. We're all under heavy siege from the enemy; he's trying to pick us off one by one from the outside, using our weaknesses against us, striking us in vicious ways. Rick told me tonight that's the only way to destroy the band, because from within the group itself, we're as tight as can be. Coming at us through our families, however, is one way to get us to stop leading young people in worship and leading them to Christ. All of us agreed that if we're going to follow God in this, we need to be completely open and honest between each other and help each other be accountable, and help each other's families stay strong. We need each other, and we need to accept God's grace to deal with each situation as it arises.

There's something very, very special and different about this group and the people in it. I can't define it or pinpoint it; I can only say that it's there and it's real. Anyone remember the Bugs Bunny cartoon where Bugs was able to "sense" the presence of gold under the ground where he stood? He suddenly got this vibration-thingy and began bouncing up and down, and then Yosemite Sam began to dig under that spot, finally unearthing an enormous gold boulder which he promptly hauled in a wheelbarrow to the general store to cash it in. Well, I'm getting that same sense about this group. I don't know what God has planned, or how far the path goes... whether it's just another few months or whether it takes us to Nashville, I don't know, but I'm digging in this spot 'til I find what God's got hidden here. It's gotta be good, because there's so much effort and anguish involved in the process.



With that, goodnight. I'm going to get some shuteye.

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