British Nannies

I was checking one of my favorite bloggers, Kevin McGehee of Yippee-Ki-Yay, and noticed he'd posted about a BBC news item. I went to read the original article and laughed out loud, so I thought you might enjoy it as well:

UK doctors call for ban on kitchen knives

Where to begin fisking this one? It's really too easy, but it's the beginning of Memorial Day weekend, so perhaps a few gimmes are in order here.

A&E (Accident & Emergency) doctors are calling for a ban on long pointed kitchen knives to reduce deaths from stabbing.

A team from West Middlesex University Hospital said violent crime is on the increase -- and kitchen knives are used in as many as half of all stabbings.

They argued many assaults are committed impulsively, prompted by alcohol and drugs, and a kitchen knife often makes an all too available weapon.

The research is published in the British Medical Journal.

The researchers said there was no reason for long pointed knives to be publicly available at all.

They consulted 10 top chefs from around the UK, and found such knives have little practical value in the kitchen.

None of the chefs felt such knives were essential, since the point of a short blade was just as useful when a sharp end was needed.

Let's don't expect people to suffer the consequences of their actions... let's just remove all the sharp, pointy things from life so that nobody can do anything to anyone. Of course, "a very sharp spoon" might come into play here...

The researchers said a short pointed knife may cause a substantial superficial wound if used in an assault -- but is unlikely to penetrate to inner organs.

In contrast, a pointed long blade pierces the body like "cutting into a ripe melon".

The use of knives is particularly worrying amongst adolescents, say the researchers, reporting that 24% of 16-year-olds have been shown to carry weapons, primarily knives.

The study found links between easy access to domestic knives and violent assault are long established.

Particularly when you've made guns illegal so people have a difficult time protecting themselves from scummy thugs you've allowed to emigrate freely into your country from places around the world where lawlessness abounds...

French laws in the 17th century decreed that the tips of table and street knives be ground smooth.

Oh, definitely, if the French did it, it must be smart.

A century later, forks and blunt-ended table knives were introduced in the UK in an effort to reduce injuries during arguments in public eating houses.

The free market at work... they became available, so people bought them. The 18th-century government didn't forcibly remove them.

The researchers say legislation to ban the sale of long pointed knives would be a key step in the fight against violent crime.

"The Home Office is looking for ways to reduce knife crime.

"We suggest that banning the sale of long pointed knives is a sensible and practical measure that would have this effect."

Home Office spokesperson said there were already extensive restrictions in place to control the sale and possession of knives.

"The law already prohibits the possession of offensive weapons in a public place, and the possession of knives in public without good reason or lawful authority, with the exception of a folding pocket knife with a blade not exceeding three inches.

"Offensive weapons are defined as any weapon designed or adapted to cause injury, or intended by the person possessing them to do so.

"An individual has to demonstrate that he had good reason to possess a knife, for example for fishing, other sporting purposes or as part of his profession (e.g. a chef) in a public place.

Demonstrate to whom?

"The manufacture, sale and importation of 17 bladed, pointed and other offensive weapons have been banned, in addition to flick knives and gravity knives."

And isn't it obvious that banning them has had a positive effect on the crime rate... not to mention that the only thing that happens when you ban it is that criminals tend not to care about the law anyway, which then means that the law-abiding people have been disarmed and made more vulnerable to wicked people with sharp pointy things who don't care whether the bad policeman with his nightstick says they aren't allowed to have those sharp pointy things.

A spokesperson for the Association of Chief Police Officers said: "ACPO supports any move to reduce the number of knife related incidents, however, it is important to consider the practicalities of enforcing such changes.

Thank you... as if you could possibly remove all the sharp pointy things from life to keep the widdle darlings fwom hurting themselves.

So many people are unwilling to face the fact that there are BAD PEOPLE in this old world that won't be fazed by all our UN proclamations and legislative actions and sternly-worded letters because all they know is VIOLENCE and it will take VIOLENCE to get through their thick skulls...